Setting Boundaries: The Ultimate Self-Care Technique During Challenging Times

Small, consistent self-care habits for emotional balance and resilience

Emotional regulation is a skill we can all develop, and it starts with small, consistent choices that honor our minds, bodies, and spirits.

Something I share with many other adults with ADHD is how often I have “ah ha” moments when I am in motion.  Sweating on my Peloton on a recent Monday morning lead to a profound realization about emotional regulation that I want to share with you. Exercise is more than a physical activity; it’s an emotional stabilizer, a mindset shifter, and a resilience builder. For those managing ADHD or a perpetually busy brain, it can be an absolute game-changer.

When I lived in LA,  I was a member of a fantastic gym.  It was not only where I went to workout up to 6 days a week, but also the place I socialized and even met people who later became clients.  Then we moved to Portland Oregon and the pandemic started, preventing me from creating a new gym habit.  

Even after the pandemic ended and we moved to Palm Springs to a development that has it’s own fitness center, I found myself skipping workouts.  My routines had been disrupted and I just couldn’t seem to get back on track. So, I bought a Peloton.  No more “I don’t have time” or “the gym is too far.” Having access to high-quality workouts right in my own home removed the barriers I used to let myself off the hook. But what I didn’t expect was how much consistency in exercise would do for my emotional health. 

Exercise became more than just a way to stay in shape; it became a tool for managing stress, balancing emotions, and lifting my mood, especially on tough days. The beauty of exercise is that it’s adaptable, and Peloton makes it possible to access a wide variety of on demand and live classes. Whether you love high-energy spin classes, calming yoga, or lifting weights to feel powerful, there’s something for everyone. 

Running businesses and managing all the other responsibilities life throws at us, physical activity is about so much more than fitness. It’s a pillar of emotional stability and mental clarity. Finding an activity that feels good to you makes it easier to show up consistently, and that’s where the magic happens. You don’t need to invest in a Peloton either,  brisk walking has the same benefits, for the cost of a decent pair of shoes.  Want to dance in your living room to your favorite music?  Do it.  Swimming more your style? Find a pool. There is no perfect form of exercise, the one for you is the one you’ll do. 

You want to know what else helps with emotional regulation?  Meditation. For years, I avoided meditation because the thought of sitting still and trying to “clear my mind” sounded impossible. My ADHD brain wasn’t built for that—or so I thought. But once I discovered ADHD-friendly approaches to meditation, like short guided sessions, everything changed. It became less about emptying my mind and more about anchoring myself in the present moment. Over time, this small, consistent practice began to enhance my ability to regulate emotions and respond calmly to challenges. And, just like exercise, there are many types of meditation (including walking meditation) so the one you will do is the one for you. 

Another tool that’s made a huge difference for me is tapping, or Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). This practice involves tapping on specific acupressure points while focusing on emotions or thoughts that feel heavy or overwhelming. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve turned to tapping during a stressful day and felt immediate relief.  I will be honest, it felt a little odd in the beginning to be talking to myself and tapping on my face and body, but the results made me a believer, so I encourage you to get past your self consciousness and give it a try, as well. 

Of course, emotional regulation doesn’t just come from quick fixes; it’s built on a foundation of self-care. For years, I thought I could power through on caffeine and grit, but I’ve learned the hard way that hydration, nutrition, sleep, and regular exercise aren’t optional—they’re essential. These habits form the groundwork for emotional resilience and help us bounce back from setbacks with strength and clarity.

As helpful as all of my self care tools are, the most important lessons I’ve learned are related to the power of boundaries. For many of us, especially during the holidays, emotions can run high, and family dynamics can be complicated. Setting boundaries with people or situations that drain your energy isn’t selfish—it’s survival. Protecting your peace allows you to stay focused on your goals and show up as your best self, both personally and professionally.  

Many people are finding that the current political climate is very triggering and they are better off avoiding watching the news, paying attention to social media and having conversations with people on both sides of the political fence if they tend to ensnare us in heated dialogs.  I am prioritizing my wellbeing and peace of mind, because I can do a lot more good from an emotionally regulated head space. 

As we head into the holiday season, I encourage you to think about how you’re investing in yourself. Emotional regulation is a skill we can all develop, and it starts with small, consistent choices that honor our minds, bodies, and spirits. Whether it’s trying a new workout, experimenting with meditation, or setting a boundary you’ve been avoiding, every step you take is a step toward greater emotional stability and resilience.

Remember, you’re not just running a business—you’re managing your well-being, too. Let’s make it a priority together. If this resonates with you, I’d love to hear your thoughts. 

Feel free to DM me on LinkedIn or Instagram @coachdiannwingert or send me an email at diann@diannwingertcoaching.com. I'd love to hear your thoughts! If you'd like to hear the full episode on the ADHD-ish Podcast, you can do that here.